Shinigami Women's Association: Trading Cards
by Amyanddan
Summary: Needing a new fundraiser, the SWA decides to make trading cards of the Gotei Thirteen. But some of the Gotei Thirteen disagree and don't like this idea. Will they be able to get everyone's picture?
1. Meeting

**Shinigami Women's Association: Trading Card Revenge**

**Chapter 1: The Meeting**

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><p>"Welcome to this Month's S.W.A. meeting. Today we will be taking suggestions for our new fundraiser, as our last one, the bake sale, failed." Nanao said, causing everyone to have a flashback of the horrid attempt to get money.<p>

-_Flashback-_

_"Bake sale! Bake Sale! Only 400 kan! Bake Sale! We have brownies, cupcakes, cake, cookies, tarts, and best of all: CANDY!" The SWA leader, Yachiru screamed. She was jumping up and down while holding some of their goods. _

_"President, candy isn't... normally in a bake sale," Nanao Ise, the vice president said._

_"Well, it should be," Yachiru said, causing her to be quiet. _

_Just then, an elderly woman came up to the stand. "You're so cute! Can I please buy a cookie," she said, pointing to one of the pink frosted ones that Nemu Kurotsuchi had made. _

_"Sure! That'll be 400 kan," Yachiru said, handing the women the cookie on a napkin. The lady gave Yachiru the money and walked away, politely saying thank you. But then, all of the sudden, the elderly women fainted onto the ground and quickly turned purple. _

_"What did you put in these, Nemu?" asked a worried Isane._

_"Master told me to put poison number four in them. He said it worked better then sugar," Nemu said. The group dead-panned. All of their cookies had been poisoned. _

_"Get rid of them, quick before someone else buys them," Nanao said while dragging the body behind their stand. Isane grabbed the cookies and dumped them in the nearest trash can._

_While Isane was getting rid of the cookies, Yachiru crossed off the part of the sign that said cookies. Next Ichigo Kurosaki, the Substitute Shinigami came. He purchased a bunny shaped cupcake and took a bite of it. "What… the... hell... is... in... this," he muttered as he fell to the floor. _

_"Nemu, quick!" Nemu grabbed his body and put it behind the stand. She stacked him up on top of the elderly women. Isane quickly grabbed the cupcakes and the other things that Rukia made and chucked them in the trash can. It was now overflowing with failed baked goods._

_Later that day, there was a stack of ten bodies behind the stand and there was a dumpster full of baked goods. "Well that was a bust," Nanao muttered as they quickly chucked the bodies into another dumpster and fled the scene._

_-End Flashback-_

They all shuddered. "We are not doing that ever again," Nanao said, causing everyone to nod their heads. "So any ideas for the fundraiser?"

Rukia was the first to speak. "We should sell Chappy merchandise!"

"Not enough people would buy that. Next," Nanao muttered.

"We could set up a kissing booth," Rangiku added. "You'd finally have your first kiss Nanao!"

An angry look appeared on her face. "NO!"

An invisible light bulb appeared over Isane's head. "We could make trading cards for all of the Gotei Thirteen captains, lieutenants, important seats, and the Substitute Shinigami!" Nanao stopped bickering with Rangiku and looked over. It actually wasn't a bad idea.

"We should do that, Vice President!" Yachiru excitedly cheered.

"Does everyone want to do that?" Everyone's hands went up. "Okay then, we'll do that. President, do we have enough cameras?"

"Yup," she exclaimed. She ran and got out some cameras. She started passing them out as Nanao began explaining a few things.

"We will have a meeting next week to see whose pictures we still need to get. That should conclude our meeting," Nanao said. They all got out of their seats and walked out of the room, cameras in hand. A few evil grins were seen as they walked outside. This was going to be fun...

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><p>Authors Note: So that's the first chapter! Please review and respond! *If you review you can tell me whose pictures you want to be taken...* I'll try to have the next chapter up as soon as possible!<p>

Amyanddan


	2. Byakuya

**Shinigami Womens Association: Trading Cards**

**Chapter 2 Byakuya**

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><p>Isane and Nemu were stuck getting the picture of Byakuya Kuchiki, the sixth division captain. It wasn't that they wanted to; they were forced to do it. Everyone, even Rukia, had been too scared to do it. Hence they were now stuck in a tunnel in the Kuchiki Manor.<p>

"Nemu, are we going the right way," Isane asked. It had been a while since they had seen a hatch to get out of the tunnel with, and Nemu was the one who had the map.

"I'm not sure," she said. "This map is hard to read." While she said that, she showed the map to Isane. Poorly illustrated drawings of Kenpachi Zakari and bunnies were all over the map, covering the actual information.

"I knew we shouldn't have got a map from Yachiru," Isane mumbled. It was well known that their president acted like a three year old in many ways. Isane wouldn't put it past her for her to do that.

And so they continued on, this time completely lost in the vast tunnels under the manor. It had been quite a few hours since they had snuck into the manor and they had still not found an exit. Eventually, Isane had become uncharacteristically annoyed.

"When the hell are we getting there? I'm bored," Isane angrily whined. While she was complaining, she had crashed into a wall that had a wooden ladder on it. At the top was a hatch that let just a tiny bit of light out.

"We're here," Nemu said. They both climbed out of the tunnel and entered a huge hallway with pale cream walls.

"Are you sure this is it?" Isane questioned Nemu. The Kuchiki clan member was nowhere to be seen.

"No."

Isane sighed and said, "Let's just go back into the tunnel." As they turned around and headed back towards the tunnel, a female servant had started walking down the hallway. She was wearing the normal servant clothes and had long blond hair. She looked more like a child then an adult, and by the looks of it, she was a huge fan of Kuchiki Byakuya. While her servant clothes appeared normal at first sight, small cherry blossoms were embroidered in the corner of her robe.

"Are you a guest of Master Kuchiki," the girl asked, smiling.

"No," Nemu answered.

"Well then I'm afraid I'll have to ask you to leave," the young girl said, her smile slightly faltering.

"No," Nemu said as she quickly knocked her out with a kick. The young girl fell over backwards. Nemu quickly grabbed her, opened the hatch, and chucked her into the tunnel.

"Was that really the best way to handle that?" Isane gave Nemu a questioning look.

Nemu had opened her mouth to respond when out of the corner of her eye she spotted a gangly man walking past them. She quickly grabbed Isane and shoved her behind a potted plant, and joined her quickly.

"Why did you-" Isane said, but was interrupted when Nemu shot a glance at the man. She quickly went silent; she had no desire to knock out more innocent people. As the man got closer, Nemu began speaking.

"I'm just a plant. No people here! Meow!" The man stopped walking and looked towards the plant. Isane was shooting a weird look at Nemu as she slapped her palm to her face. However, the smack of Isane's palm hitting her face had caused the man to come even closer to the potted plant. The two SWA members leaned back and hoped not to be seen, even though it was rather inevitable that he would find them.

As the man got closer, he opened his mouth to say the dreaded words…

"… Damn drugs. Now I'm hearing things," he mumbled as he started to walk again and passed down the long, decorated hall. Isane let out a visible sigh of relief as they crawled out from behind the plant. She was amazed that the man did not realize that they were behind the plant.

"That was lucky," she muttered. Nemu nodded her head in agreement as they began looking for their tunnel once again. Somehow, in the few minutes they had been distracted, the two females had forgotten where the hatch was.

After a few minutes, a loud scream was heard. Nemu turned her head to see a screaming Isane fall down what appeared to be the hatch. Nemu looked over the edge as Isane fell, and didn't help Isane in the least, despite her complaints.

A loud thud was heard as she collided into the ground. Isane grumbled as she reluctantly got back up on of her feet while Nemu was going down into the tunnel via the ladder. "You could have helped me," she muttered. The Kurotsuchi girl didn't seem to hear that comment and they continued on their hopeless trek to get a picture of Kuchiki Byakuya.

**-A few hours later-**

They were still in the tunnel and had not found Kuchiki Byakuya. After going through many hatches they still had not found him somehow. It was now near sunset, and the two SWA members had spent all of their day in the tunnels, trying to get a photo of him. In fact, they were about ready to give up until they happened to stumble upon yet another hatch. If this one wasn't it, they were going to give up.

Isane lifted the hatch slightly. To her surprise, the sixth division captain was in the room, practicing calligraphy. She quickly closed the hatch and nodded at Nemu. The captain was actually in there, so they would have to be very quick in getting his picture and escaping. The two females quickly climbed up the ladder, prepared to get the sought picture.

With a thud, Nemu and Isane quickly climbed out of the hatch and Nemu began taking a few pictures of the Kuchiki. Somehow, he had not noticed them come in, and hopefully he wouldn't now.

"Butter," Nemu said when taking a picture.

"It's cheese," Isane replied.

"Butter."

"Cheese."

"Butter."

"Cheese."

"Bankai." They both looked at him and saw the pink flurry of petals rapidly approaching towards them. Quickly sprinting, they ran through the glass doors, shattering the glass. After only getting a few feet away from the manor, the flower petals overwhelmed the two…

**-A Few Days Later-**

Isane's eyes fluttered open as she slowly sat up. As she glanced around at her surroundings, she saw Nemu in a different bed on the other side of the room. They were in the fourth division, and there was no doubt about that.

"Nemu, did we get the picture," Isane asked Nemu when she saw that she had risen. In response, the girl just tossed her the camera. Isane managed to catch it, but right when it landed in her hands, it shattered into many pieces. "I take that as a no," Isane sighed. So great for that, she thought.

They had failed. Isane wasn't really surprised, but they had failed. That whole trek was for nothing she thought as her thoughts were cut off by the lull of sleep.

**-In the SWA meeting room-**

Yachiru, who had received the camera earlier frowned, which was thought impossible until today. "Bya-kun, you meanie," she said as wrote down on their white board that they had failed. However, while Isane and Nemu were injured and Yachiru was busy with the board, another SWA member smiled with an evil grin as she thought of a plan…

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><p><em>AN: And that's the end of this chapter. This took longer then I thought it would to write, and my computer had deleted this story THREE times, so this is really late in terms of updating! Sorry about that._

_Anyhow, because I took so long to write this and I wanted to post it as soon as possible, I did not have time to proofread this, so a whole bunch of errors are probably in this one. I need a beta reader *sighs*. One of my friends was going to be mine, but her parents blocked fanfic on her computer because it was "distracting her". Until she gets fanfic unblocked, expect errors. _

_I literally had to rack my brain for this chapter because I wanted to make it different then the omake, but I still wanted it to be pretty similar. I'm not sure if I really like this chapter though, so I wouldn't say it's one of my best ones. Expect a (hopefully) better chapter next time._

_I'm really busy right now with school and tennis right now, so I will try to update as soon as I can, but don't expect the next chapter to be out tomorrow or anything. That, and my birthday's in seven days so I have an excuse to be lazy. (Bad excuse, but it works.)_

_Anyway, please R&R! I'll see you in... I have no clue with another chapter._

_Amyanddan_


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